40 Comments
User's avatar
Ilona 🌺's avatar

great essay and while I could see both sides of this debate, I agree with your points wholeheartedly! in the end, those trying to police the authenticity of other people's hobbies and reading lists just struggle to not get the ego boost of being the intellectual ones if something becomes more popular, when in reality this does not take from the original works value so this gatekeeping is nonsensical.

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

agreed! thanks for reading <3

Expand full comment
piperxreid's avatar

YES the fear of reading in public now bcs of this trend is crazyyyy like let me have hobbies

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

hahah yes it’s never that deep!

Expand full comment
Shabeeh Asim's avatar

agree heavily with this! on your point about how a lot of young people want to criticise other young people, i personally believe it stems from witnessing our parents refer to us as the “selfie generation” or saying that we don’t know “real music” (aka hall and oates or fleetwood mac and the typical older music) etc etc etc. i think a lot of gen z have internalised that generalisation from their parents/older generations and so they genuinely believe that most other young people only listen to artists like Clairo to be performative because as their parents told them, we apparently don’t know real music! except for them of course, because they just happened to listen to Clairo properly, unlike all the other posers in their generation.

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

ooh interesting take, i agree! i think gen z’s obsession with a casual, ‘candid’, nonchalant instagram also stems being desperate to escape the “selfie generation” reputation

Expand full comment
mae's avatar

I love your essay! This is honestly becoming such a problem in the online space. It's a trend to have a lot of hobbies but then they turn around and complain that people are only doing it for views. What's the worst thing that would happen if someone carries a book around & never reads it? (sorry for the long note😅)

Expand full comment
nininica's avatar

I just think people should mind there own business and stop spreading hate. Performative behavior or not, we should mind our own life. Let people do what they want to do as long as they are not doing the bad stuff. Let them live.

Expand full comment
izzi 🇵🇸's avatar

hey, i love this! i’ve been thinking about this whole ‘performative male’ criticism for a while. people aren’t allowed to just enjoy things anymore, and that’s sad. thank you for this take 🫶🏼

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

thanks for reading!

Expand full comment
ocdiva's avatar

this is so well-written and comprehensive, I really agree! the last paragraph in particular really stood out to me, heavvvy on the people performing social activism and not practicing it! i wrote about sort of similar stuff if you're interested <3 also just subscribed, your stuff seems right up my alley!

https://ocdiva.substack.com/p/arent-we-all-performative

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

thanks! i’ll check it out

Expand full comment
C. Selene's avatar

What a ridiculous trend! I will continue reading in public, too...

Expand full comment
Wordy Ramblings's avatar

I literally tried writing about this topic but couldn’t fully articulate what was bothering me about it, but you literally hit the nail on the head with it!

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

aw thank you!

Expand full comment
Enchanted Forest Art Press's avatar

A perspective from an older person....my late teens to mid 20s was 70 percent performance. We perform what we want to be to figure out who we are. Im disheartened to see young people being encouraged to skip this necessary step. At age 43, I still perform about 10 to 20 percent, because I'm still growing. But it's with greater confidence of knowing now the things I am not.

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

i really love this outlook, thank you for sharing your perspective 💗

Expand full comment
Thoughts by Blest's avatar

Love the essay I especially enjoyed the last part, I definitely agree that there are other bigger issues that we should be worrying about.

Expand full comment
L Binnie 🩸's avatar

Wonderful essay. I agree with you!

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

thank you!

Expand full comment
Soph's avatar

I think we’ve forgotten that the real problem is not the “performance” itself, but rather the bad faith behind it.

Also, yeah, sometimes people just Like Stuff.

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

well said!

Expand full comment
Alayna's avatar

I think this is a great take on the whole "performative" movement now! Bring back having genuine passions, and also the ability to try new things!!!!

Expand full comment
Luna Yoshi's avatar

I think we label things as performative because so many things that once required personal choice and individual taste (books, "niche" music, little keepsakes etc) are now being consumed to emulate the "vibe" of a person who reads, for example. The cultural context, the desire is different. People read Dostoyevsky not because they're necessarily interested in what the book says, but they want to appear that they care. AI is used for so much now that physical, tangible proof that you're thinking for yourself is a vehicle to feel intellectually superior, and to inform those around you. It's very chic to be an individual because it's becoming harder and harder to do so. People don't understand how to be individual, because their definition of it has been built on the romanticized aesthetics of it. They want it, but are missing the point; individuality is a long arduous journey that must be taken with the goal of self actualization, not to be "cool".

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

yes! individually is such an interesting concept when it comes to the internet

Expand full comment
Aleesha's avatar

Yessss! Belittling young men and telling them that exploration into these culturally-associated feminine things will just push them towards the alt-right pipeline and toxic masculinity

Expand full comment
Mia 💌's avatar

agreed!

Expand full comment